The best sub of my life

So today is Thursday which means it is the day that I visit my OB. I've been going to my OB visits by myself since they pretty much have consisted of the same things; weight check, blood pressure check, check the heartbeats, and ask if I have any questions. But since we are nearing the end Morgan decided he wanted to take me. We were hoping to get a little more info about a date to plan our c section.

We were in the lobby and happened to see a couple that we had a childbirth class with. They were telling us that they were headed to triage due to a high blood pressure. After they left we got called back. I did all my normal check up things and then the nurse took my blood pressure. She grimaced a little and said "Well it's 152 over 80" I don't speak nurse so I asked if that was bad and she said it was a little high. I've had great blood pressure my entire pregnancy so they tell me so I was freaked out something was different.

We went to an exam room and the doctor came in to check the babies. They looked great so she checked my BP again. Still high so she said I'm now on bed rest and also I would be taking a trip to triage to be monitored for a while.

Now I was assured that this was no big deal, I was probably going to be sent home after a few hours, but I was still freaked! We got to the Women's Pavilion and got checked in. After a few minutes we got put in a triage room and I had all kinds of gadgets and whatnots strapped to me. My blood pressure had already started to go down. They drew blood and kept monitoring me for 45 min. I'm so glad Morgan was there or I would have gone crazy. After we were there for a bit I told him I was STARVING but I didn't want him to leave me. He called his m0m and asked her to bring us some lunch. In the meantime I was told my labs came back normal and my BP was going down good. The girls heart rates were super. Harriet got there and had the best sub I've ever eaten. A Jimmy Johns Beach Club, yum! I realized as I was eating it that it was 3:30 and I had nothing since 6:30.

We got discharged and headed home. Now I begin my exhausting bed rest. I'm hoping I don't go stir crazy. But the good news is it will only be for a little more than a week.

Countdown

I decided this week it was time for a countdown. I have loved being pregnant I really have. Some of my favorite things have been

1.Feeling my girls move and being able to see my belly roll around like crazy.

2. Getting the sweet encouragement from complete strangers whenever I'm out and about.

3. Getting spoiled by my sweet husband, family, and friends.

But I've reached that point. If you've had a baby you know what point I mean. I'm done. I just feel like I've got this giant growth on the front of my body that prevents me from doing easy task. I feel tired just from putting dishes in the cabinet. I miss sleeping through the night on my tummy.

Enough complaining, nobody likes to hear that. So I'm 34 weeks and in twin pregnancy my doctor has told me I won't go past 38 weeks. Since my weeks start on Tuesdays that means I have just a little over 3 weeks left!! 38 weeks for me would mean I will have 2 babies by May 10 at least.

We are still hoping to have a regular labor and delivery, but Baby B decided to move sideways again. We go again on Monday and I'm hoping to see her little head down, but if not I'm ok with having to have a c-section. Whatever gets my babies here the safest way possible. I'm nervous because I've never really had any surgery before, but I know it's so routine now that there is not much to worry about. Even still I'd much rather be able to deliver my babies without a section.

So what's left to do before our lil ladies come into our world? Actually not that much. We've been so blessed by family and friends We've been able to get our cribs, car seats, stroller, high chairs, bouncy seats, breast pump and mattresses as gifts. Not to mention the countless diapers, sheets, cute outfits and tons of other misc gifts. Each one has meant so much to us. I've got my eye on a special nursing pillow by My Brest Friend that is made for twins. We need to pick up a baby swing, and just a few little things here and there. There will probably be things that come up, but all the "big" items are taken care of for now.

So this week I'm focusing on starting to pack our hospital bags, just in case. We might also put in the car seats so that can be taken care of. Ok think my ramblings are over for now. Time to eat some chicken wings!!

What a year it's been

Last year at this time I was going through what has probably been the hardest time in my life so far. Most of you know our story, but on April 1st of last year we found out that our baby had passed away at 11 weeks gustation. Having a miscarriage is one of the most emotionally painful experiences a woman can have. Even though I never saw or held that baby, my whole heart loved it. On April 7th, I had a D&C at the hospital and that was both the harsh reality that our baby was gone, but also our first steps in moving on. Unless you've been through that type of loss yourself there is no way to understand what someone who has had a miscarriage is feeling. I had a lot of sadness, hopelessness, and anger. But I also had a lot of love. It helped us so much to know there were people across the country praying for us. It's been a year, and sometime that pain is still fresh. Even though God has blessed us with twin girls who will be here soon, I can't help but think of the baby I didn't get to meet. Was it a boy or girl? What would it look like or act like. These are things I can't know now, but what a blessing to know that one day God will introduce me to this precious child and I'll finally be able to hold them. I may never understand why I never got to see them, but I know God has given that sweet baby more love then I ever could. God has brought us from the most intense pain to unspeakable joy. Morgan and I only have a few short weeks before we will be holding our two little girls. We had wonderful news Monday that both babies were in a head down position, making my chances for a vaginal birth a lot more likely. I still have been able to work and get around without bed rest which is a blessing. Baby A is a little more skinny then we would like so hopefully she'll fatten up in these next few weeks. I just can't believe how far we've come. I know that each April I'll remember the hardship we had to go through, but as each year passes it will become easier and easier.

Another Nursery Project

So it's pretty popular now to have a baby's name above their crib. Something cute that goes with the theme of the room. Well I didn't want my baby girls to be any different. So I thought about what I wanted to do and made a run to Michaels. We picked up some 9" letters that happened to be white.

Here are the letters for Rose,

and Kate!

We looked at several types of letters they had there, but these white ones where the only ones the size I wanted. I took probably too long walking back and forth trying to decide. The white ones were a little pricier, but just what I wanted. Then I was struck by a brilliant idea. Instead of buying fabric for Mod Podge, how about...

Just some pink spray paint and white yard sale stickers, about 3/4 inch in diameter. We're making pock a dots! I found this paint at Wal-mart and loved the color. Not to babyfied so they can keep the letters for awhile. I think it was called Watermelon.

So step one was to put the white stickers randomly on the letters. I did this part because bless his heart, Morgan is too OCD to adhere to randomness. Also I can't get near the spray paint so this is the only real job I could do.

Step two, Morgan taped up the sides. This wasn't necessary but we liked the idea of the sides remaining white while the top was painted.

Step three, after everything is taped up Morgan took the letters to the garage to apply the spray paint. We didn't mess with any primer. I didn't get a picture of the next step.

Step four was to peel the tape off the sides and carefully peel the stickers off the front. I think Morgan used a razor blade to start the stickers. I didn't watch because I was too nervous something would be messed up. I also enjoyed the anticipation of waiting to see the finished project.

Ta-Da!! Here is the one for Rose. I love how simple it looks and the pink really blends well with the lavender walls.

And here is Kate's. Oh the letters had holes to hang them from on the back. This was another Morgan job because I'm not really known for hanging things up straight. Also I have a giant belly that gets between me and the wall.

And here is what they both look like. I have some more things to get done in the nursery but more things are finished then need to get done! Less then 6 weeks till we have two baby girls to enjoy this room!!

You know you're loved when...

.....Your husband doesn't make fun of you when you come home from the grocery store crying for no reason.

.....Your husband will rub your ugly swollen feet every night even if a big belly has prevented you from shaving your legs for awhile.

.....Your husband helps make dinner every night even if he's been working hard all day, or at least takes you to Chick-fil-a.

.....Your husband gets excited when you tell him about a great deal on diapers you got online.

.....Your husband tucks you in every night and kisses you then the belly that is holding his babies.

And the clincher that lets you know you are loved....

.....Your husband goes to childbirth classes with you where on the first night they show "the film" of a live birth and still wants to attend the rest of the class, and talks with you about the stuff you learned, and practices breathing with you only making you giggle a little bit in class, and lets you know he is going to be right there with you when your babies make their appearance.

Yep, that's how I know I'm loved!

My pretty girls

Okay so Morgan has asked that I not put our ultrasound pics on Facebook. Something about showing my uterus or something like that. Anyway instead I've put a few on my little blog. We went to the Fetal Medicine doctor on Monday. They have a higher lever ultrasound and do all kind of measurements. When we went there for the first time at 12 weeks the tech told me "You'll get so tired of ultrasounds by the time your done!" I didn't believe her. Well while I'm not tired of seeing my sweet baby girls, after this trip I was tired of the ultrasound itself. My belly was poked and pushed on so much I felt sore afterwards. It was worth it though. Both girls are doing great and getting close to 3 lbs a piece. That's almost 6 lbs. of baby!! When the doctor left the tech very quickly got out the 4D wand and took a few freebie shots for us. Just the faces but here they are.

This is baby B who is up top. She is my mover and kicker. She is also the one who likes her personal space and gave us a hard time showing us her privates at 19 weeks.

See told you Baby B was shy. This was right after the first pic of her and she let us know she wanted privacy by putting her arm in front of her face! I'm thinking this may be my stubborn redhead. She still is holding out on getting head down for us.

This is Baby A, the one on the bottom. She's a good little girl already in a head down position. I'm thinking she has a little bit of an Oliff nose on her.

Another of Baby A's face....oh wait, also a little Baby B foot too. These girls are in pretty tight quarters and apparently already pushing and shoving each other. Or fighting for attention. Either way, it made for a cute pic. The tech assured me that even though we couldn't see it they were separated by a membrane so little girl A wasn't really getting kicked by her sister.

I can't wait to meet my little peanuts!!

Ramblings

Last Thursday my good friend Kara had her sweet little boy, Egan. We went and saw mom, dad, and baby that night. On the way there I made Morgan stop to get some flowers. I really did want to give Kara some flowers, but Morgan also realized that I didn't want to go into the Women's Center of the hospital having people think I was there to deliver! It was great to hold this brand new baby boy and feel my little girls kicking in my own belly (jealous of mommy holding another baby, perhaps?)

Anyway, after we left I started my own little mental freak out realizing our girls will be here in less then 2 months! There is so much to do, so much left to get, and so much to learn in a very short amount of time. I've been having to remind myself everyday to not worry. Ususally I'm not a worrier, but being pregnant has changed that.

I worry about their delivery - A cesearen isn't guarenteed but it is a higher chance. I keep talking to them everyday asking them if they could please go ahead and get head down for mommy. I also want them to bake as long as they can so we don't have to have any NICU time. But I'm thankful that our hospital has that facility if we need it.

I worry about bringing them home and figuring out what to do with them all day. I know babies have to have schedules, but do they determine it or me? There is so much I don't know about raising and caring for infants, and I know I'll learn, but it's scary to realize two little humans will be realing on me to care for them!

I worry about feeding them. I really want to be able to nurse my babies, but how do you feed two babies? Will I be topless for the first 6 months of their lives? Will my body produce enough milk to feed 2 kids? Will I even be able to do it?

I worry about our finances. Right now we are really not sure what we are going to do. I've always had the desire to be a stay at home mom. I've always assumed that's what I would do when I had babies. But we live in very hard times now. If I were to leave my job that would be great financially difficulty for us. If I were to go back to work, we'd be paying a fortune in childcare and I'd be heartbroken everyday leaving my two sweet babies. This is probably the number one worry I struggle with the most. I catch myself crying on a daily basis not knowing what the future holds. What I do know is that God has a plan, He's just waiting a little longer to show us what it is. I prayed daily after loosing our other babies that God would send us a child and He sent us 2! I trust that He will provide a way for me to stay home and raise our children. I just have to be patient and wait on His timing.

So, during your busy day, if you happen to think about it, pray for me. Pray that God would calm my nerves. Easy my worry. Let me know He's in control. Thanks!